Eine Kleine Nichtmusik

Witty and pertinent observations on matters of great significance OR Incoherent jottings on total irrelevancies OR Something else altogether OR All of the above

Sunday, January 30, 2011

The Whole F***ing Show

On Thursday, Ruairidh and I did one of those father-and-son things: we drove through to Glasgow for the TNA Impact! wrestling tour. Yes, several hours of highly-choreographed mayhem, as American as apple pie (or as apple pie which had been whacked with a fake guitar and then had a 270 lb man jump on it from a height).

We had excellent seats, and if the show ever appears on TV then when you get to the bit where the announcer comes out into the audience and one of the fans proposes to his girlfriend in front of the cameras, we're right behind them (they were sitting in our row before they stood up).

We watched Angelina Love and Mickie James beat Madison Rayne and Tara (I'm always surpsised by how normal the female wrestlers look compared with most of the men).

We saw Matt Morgan ("The Blueprint"), who must be about 7 ft tall, demolish one of the few black fighters "The Pope" (I couldn't resist a "Pope on a rope" gag).

The wonderfully named tag team Beer Money defeated The British Invasion. The latter (in their union jack shorts) arre very popular in the USA, but as they're English they didn't have much of a Glasgow fan base. Beer Money, meanwhile, despite being one of the Teams They Love To Hate (the technical term is "heels") on the TNA circuit, very obviously had a large and vocal following. When they won the cheering was considerable.

Jeff Jarrett (now retired as a wrestler and one of the organisers of TNA) had issued a challenge to anyone from Glasgow to take him on. So of course someone did (or so the script ran): cue Lionheart. He did pretty well before being decked with a guitar (chairs are SO 20th century).

Finally, the main bout was Rob van Dam (tag line "The whole fucking show") with Mr Anderson (I was disappointed that he didn't wear dark glasses and a suit) against the Hardy Boys. Ruairidh was very keen to see the latter, and was a little disappointed that the match didn't last longer. He did rate it highly as a match though, as did I.

Other reports here, here and best of all here.

Perhaps the best moment of the night though was when Ruairidh was listening to the music playing between bouts and suddenly broke into a huge grin as he realised he was hearing a mashup of Stevie Wonder's Superstition and Metallica's Sad But True.


At 01 February, 2011 15:41, Blogger JoeinVegas said...

We went to an event long ago, to catch the great Hulk Hogan as part of the list. His bout lasted about fifteen seconds (he won of course) and was over before we even saw much of his action.


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