I'm guessing Mr Collins doesn't come out of this well

I found the thought of this irresistible. It started me off thinking of sequels:

Never Say Netherfield Again
Fear of the Darcy
Something Wickham This Way Comes

or perhaps a sideways shift to Concussion (tagline: 'All the privilege I claim for my own sex...is that of screaming loudest, when ribcage or when head is gone").

Or to The Dark Knightley. Or Maneater Park.

I'll get my coat......